Colleague 1 : telephone rings..."this is ----...hello hello"....
Colleague 1 (again): picks up dials cell phone; work line begins ringing...... "this is ---- ..hello hello...." OH MY GOD I JUST CALLED MYSELF!!!
New Relationships
Colleague 1: You really think we are in the running for this.
Colleague 2: It’s like me trying to pick up Heidi Klum at a bar. Ain’t happening. Having said that, I’m willing to try because I might be her type!
Colleague 1: to quote chris rock…..
“All these years I sat at home wishing I could nail Heidi Klum, then she goes out and marries Seal. And I'm pissed….Who knew, I definitely could’ve nailed her. I am way better looking then Seal”
Colleague 2: It’s like me trying to pick up Heidi Klum at a bar. Ain’t happening. Having said that, I’m willing to try because I might be her type!
Colleague 1: to quote chris rock…..
“All these years I sat at home wishing I could nail Heidi Klum, then she goes out and marries Seal. And I'm pissed….Who knew, I definitely could’ve nailed her. I am way better looking then Seal”
How Old Am I?
Colleague 1: You know we're getting old when we start talking about all the injuries and surgeries we've all had.
Colleague 2: yeah, I recently tore my ACL heli-sking
Vendor Colleague: I once bent over too far putting my underwear on and threw my back out.
Symposium
Me: 'I've been up since 4 and I'm exhausted'
Colleague: 'this is a conference. You're here to have fun, dammit'
Client: 'you should get on the floor and dance'
Me: 'I'm not a good dancer'
Vendor colleague: 'I'll take off my shirt and dance if you want me to'
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